Nebraska Helps Trump Make America a Yuge Oily Pond

Nebraska Helps Trump Make America a Yuge Oily Pond

In an unpredictable move, Nebraska regulators are standing their ground and tell their northern neighbors they stink and they should all go the way Amherst went.

TPV asked

Why did the Nebraska Public Service Commission vote 3-2 to approve the route through the state for the Keystone XL pipeline,  just days after the original Keystone Pipeline ruptured and dumped 210,000 gallons of oil into Amherst, South Dakota?

Nebraskans shrugged off their little shoulders and yawned. Finally, one scribbled down an answer: the Keystone XL pipeline will transport up to 830,000 barrels per day of crude from Canada and North Dakota to oil refineries on the Gulf Coast. And? TPV pressed.

That was a minor accident which happened at 6 AM, local time, when Amherstians were still sleeping or drinking their hot cup of Folger’s coffee and watching Good Morning America. That’s so bourgeois. Haven’t they heard of night shifts and early morning shifts? What’s next? Drinking lattes?

Oh, the answer made sense. TPV was afraid that by removing the last big regulatory hurdle for the oil project after years of bitter protests from environmentalists and landowners, Nebraskans actually thought about helping President Elephant Trophy Trump to make America Great Like Never Before, so Trophy Trump can finally bragg:

“Doomsday is on its way and comes because of U.S. energy dominance.”

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By DANA NEACSU: Nebraska Helps Trump Make America a Yuge Oily Pond

 

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