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How to Succeed in Yard Sale Business while President

Donald Trump is teaching us how to succeed in business without really trying. Regretfully, he has a large yard sale. The largest. And he has a message too.

If you have money and want to do business with America, now it’s the time to use it.

Our alternative-facts president put America up for sale, in his yard. How?

Trump refuses to divest his businesses, because if he does, his business would collapse and he would have to file for bankruptcy faster than he gets the daily rejuvenating botox shot.

In other words, our president is sending the rich abroad a message.

Unless you are El Chapo, don’t ask what Trump can do for you, but what your gift to Trump Co., can benefit you.

Right now, any time foreign governments engage Trump Co., via guests and events at his hotels, leases in his buildings and real estate deals abroad, they gift our alternative-facts president. The higher the gift the more succulent the reward. Of course, we are not talking about a night at some swamp Trump hotel. We are talking about making sure every room in a Trump hotel is booked for years in advance.

Certainly, this leverage of influence is not available for little, tiny, itsy bitsy people. In fact, it may even seem like a lot for a small pocket, but then this is America we are talking about. And America does not do business in small change. And if you are still deluded, then stay tight with your last potato chip-bag on your lap and watch: First America, then you, little, itsy, tiny little deceived voter. Just wait and see.

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By DANA NEACSU: How to Succeed in Yard Sale Business while President