Two peas in a pod or two pees one bedding.
TPV has been silent for a long time because Trump took over everything: the real and the surreal, the direct and the irony. Trump covers everything, so there is very little left to fall through the weekly hole. Until now. Until Kavanaugh, when finally, the Federal Bureau of Investigation reverted to being the F.B.I., or as Anderson Cooper called it the Cover-Up Bureau. Or maybe that’s TPV.
- On Saturday, the Federal Bureau of Investigation was told to look into the allegation that GPO darling of the moment, minion Kavanaugh, is given to drinking so hard that when he blacks out he imitates the president and grabs the ladies by their pussies.
Kavanaugh’s master, the Don, deemed the investigation too dangerous and gave the F.B.I. a list of four people to investigate: Kavanaugh’s mother, his mother’s father, their baptizing priest and, of course, the wet nanny.
- On Sunday, the F.B.I. started to work like any good Christian would work: resting at home.
- On Monday, the F.B.I. started receiving many phone calls and it didn’t know what to do with them: none were anonymous, and all wanted to help the investigation.
- On Tuesday, the F.B.I. had a moment of weakness and the country’s counter-culture thought they would have to stop despising the Feds.
- On Wednesday, the country was back on Twitter.
- On Thursday, the F.B.I. finished the Trumpian game of cover-up.
- On Friday, Sen. Susan Collins showed her pussy to Trump and he really grabbed it tight. The Maine Senator giggled. If the women of Maine giggled too, then the F.B.I.’s work is really done, and Edgar Hoover can really sleep happily ever after.