According to Marquel, TPVs Times Judicial Nonsense correspond
Marquel thought. It used to make people happy, and build community (of a sort) to attend a town lynching. What is going through the Courts mind? Do they even have a mind or are they like Scalia, a mindless incompetent who does what he thinks he’s told?
This required investigation. I went down to Washington once more, this time to speak to the Court. I knew they wouldn’t talk (Thomas doesn’t talk at all; he’s been on strike since he was appointed and accused of offering pubic hairs to interns and such). But if I could get to some of the clerks I could probably get a better picture of what has turned the court into a judicial funny farm.
I found one clerk at a local eatery. I promised him or her confidentiality so I can reveal very little. But it was informative.
“What’s the deal with the pastor of the month?” I asked. “I can’t pin it down but something about it sounds cuckoo.”
“I agree,” said the clerk. “There was a lot of discussion about how to give every religion a chance.”
“You mean,” said I, “that each religion would get it’s chance to violate the First Amendment?”
“Unfortunately,” the clerk said, “that’s what it amounts to.”
“So they really think it’s better to have everyone violate the Amendment,” I asked, “than not at all because somehow through the mass of violations they are somehow cleansed?”
“That seems to be their view although they might not use those terms.” Answered the clerk.
“Now this pastor of the month. It sounds like a lottery , or a special at Stop and Shop.” I said. “Why does that sound so strange to me?”
The clerk answered, “Maybe because of the discount.”
“What discount?” I asked.
“Well usually the special of the week is like a loss leader sold below cost. It’s basically a sale item.” Said the clerk.
“Exactly!” I exclaimed. “Are they going to have to bid on it or take the lowest bidder, or demand some sort of package deal? It sounds like a bad joke.”
“How’s that?” Asked the clerk.
“Sort of like,” I answered, “A priest, a rabbi, and a pastor walk into a town meeting.”
“Yeah with a talking parrot or something,” the clerk added enthusiastically.
“But really, how can they give all religions a fair chance the way the pastor of the month is supposed to assure?” I asked, “because if they only get the three or four major religions where are they going to find the others? What about a Muslim?”
“The court was told there’s a prison nearby and it’s filled with them.” Said the clerk.
“Would a prisoner do or would it have to be a cleric?” I asked.
“I really don’t know,” said my clerk, “but I could ask Justice Scalia if you like.” My clerk was feeling playful.
“What if a member of a group isn’t available or what if they don’t have leaders or clerics like the Quakers?” I asked.
“Maybe they’d have to go online” said the clerk.
“And search for what?” I asked.
“Pastor of the month?” Still playful.
“I don’t think the Supremes meant it this way but, again,” I said “wouldn’t you think the pastor of the month would be on special?”
“You know since you mentioned this,” said the playful, now serious, clerk, “but there was no suggestion that the town would pay for this.”
“So basically you’re telling me that those who worship at the throne of the mighty dollar are out of luck. That church won’t be heard from” I said.
“Sad,” he said. “No golden calf at town meetings. No church of Mammon unfortunately. I think that’s where Scalia belongs. He’s a very devout Mammonite.”
“No,” I said, “and no bankers, no investment advisers, no mortgage brokers.”
“No but this case wasn’t meant for the upper class. It was a bone thrown to those who have empty plates, so to speak. But it’s still sad.” Said the clerk.
I commiserated. “Yes, it’s all very sad.”
***
If you feel sad and like to feel sadder, go to @ThePotholeView for more.
BY MARQUEL
Town Meetings Can Whisper Prayers, Justices Decided. No One Hears Them. Anyway
Ouch!
“But really, how can they give all religions a fair chance the way the pastor of the month is supposed to assure?” I asked, “because if they only get the three or four major religions where are they going to find the others? What about a Muslim?”
“The court was told there’s a prison nearby and it’s filled with them.” Said the clerk.
There is no one else like you Marquel. Funny. Sharp. Stupendous in your criticism.
Bravo!
Bravo!
What a scoop TPV! Scalia a very devout Mammonite?
I finally got it : I was always confused by the separation of church and state. I mean even if a church is in a city, it’s still in a state. Like if a church is in the city NY, it’s still in the STATE NY, right?
TOWN meetings? what’s the fuss? I never thought of towns – I guess that would be OK, especially if they whisper and don’t bother anyone who might be sleeping, just like you’re supposed to do in church.
I didn’t know Scalia listened to anyone – or do you mean when God tells him what to do?
What happened with the talking parrot??
Good question. I’ll look into it.