Home By Marquel Mamma Mia

Mamma Mia

[embedyt]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=unfzfe8f9NI[/embedyt]Marquel, TPVs NYTimes Cheeky Comments by the Pope Section correspondent, was eating pad thai, when he read  Pope on Charlie Hebdo: There Are Limits to Free ExpressionPope Francis said Thursday there are limits to freedom of speech, especially when it insults or ridicules someone’s faith. He said if someone insults his mother they should “expect a punch!”

The Church rushed to emphasize that the pope didn’t literally say he would punch someone, although when he uttered the threat, he mimed a punch towards his assistant. But there were reports that, in his youth, Francis had clobbered more than a few friends and neighbors who observed that, in fact, the pope’s mother was a prostitute and, working as her own pimp, served as the Madame of Argentina’s biggest and most successful whorehouse.

It was the only one with both a boxing arena, for those who wanted to try to punch the future pope, and a chapel, for the future pope to seek forgiveness for beating up every cheap punk in Buenos Aires.

Papal aides, reemphasizing that the Pope didn’t say he, personally, would throw the punch, despite simultaneously miming that exact thing, noted that in Italy,

“there are many individuals and organizations who might be hired to do it for him.”

Marquel located the papal spokesperson and asked him, “are you saying the Pope would order a hit on anyone who insults his mother?”

“Not anyone. We’re just saying that the pope said there are limits. And that limit ends at his mother. It’s a good message for everyone. We should care for our mothers. Remember the holy mother.”

 “But she was a virgin. My mother wasn’t. Was yours?” I asked.
“Watch it fella, this is exactly what the Pope warned you about.” He said.
“But the Pope can’t seriously be threatening physical violence for an insult, can he? What happened to turn the other cheek, forgiveness, peace, and Jesus?” I asked.
“The pope says that stops at your mother.” He said.
“My mother can take care of herself. She can hire a hit as easily as the Pope. I’m concerned that the pope is setting a bad precedent.” I said.
“Remember the Pope didn’t say he’d actually do it.” He explained.
“He looked ready to. Doesn’t the Pope believe in non violence, like Martin Luther King?”
“He wasn’t Catholic. I think the Pope was speaking to his flock.” He said.
“Shouldn’t the flock be taught peace and free speech?” I asked.
“Until it’s about your mother.” He summarized.
I was really discouraged. What a week. Charlie Hebdo. Marches for free speech. Then France goes and cracks down on speech. The French just don’t get it. Neither does the Pope. I don’t think I like his mother much either.
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By MARQUEL: Mamma Mia

8 COMMENTS

  1. exactly. shall we be boringly boring? Isn’t is sufficiently sad most of us are pretty mediocre. Do we have to be boring too?

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