Home Americanism Barry & Michelle — The Mountain High

Barry & Michelle — The Mountain High

Marquel, TPVs NYTimes Mounting Rights Section correspondent, was having eggs over easy, when he read that 3,000 Miles From Denali, Ohio Fumes Over Renaming of Mount McKinley.

The renaming created rare unity between Republican and Democratic Buckeyes against President Obama, and even rarer agreement from members of both parties in Alaska praising him.

Marquel read the article and could understand why Obama has renamed the mountain in Alaska, Mount Michelle.

  • He’s a good family man.
  • And like a good president he didn’t ignore McKinley and Ohio, the old president’s state.
  • No, indeed, Obama named the stretch of Park Avenue that rises a good 75 feet from about 79th Street up to about 96th street, the new Mt McKinley. And we all get to climb it! Although most New Yorkers, sensitive to wasted energy, will probably do it on the M101 bus.

In his last term as a lame duck, Obama has felt free to roam afar, literally. He has renamed Italy’s famous Mt Etna, Mt Aetna, after the health insurance company which it turns out,

Aetna made more money, and “donated” more to the Obama campaign, over two Obama presidencies, than the entire rest of the U.S., or world, economy.

Obama has not limited himself to prominences, but also to the depths. No longer is it Death Valley, but now it is Trump Valley, signifying, according to the president, that it is

“the lowest man can descend to on earth without scuba tanks.”

He has also named the huge clump of snow on the West Side Highway near 23rd Street where the Department of Sanitation dumps its plowing each winter, as Mt Sanders because, as he says,

“It’s all melted by late summer,” when the conventions are held.

But most of Obama’s latest diktats have been non-political.

Mt Everest is now Mt Mahlia because, like the president’s touchy littlest daughter,

“one wrong step can kill you.”

And the rest of the presidents family has not been left out. K2 has been renamed Mt Forever 21 after oldest daughter Sasha‘s favorite clothing store, because

“she’s into fashion and that mountain just says, ‘I look magnificent.’ “

Other changes were announced at the same time. Mt Cannon, with the famed old man in the mountain, near Franconia , in New Hampshire, has been renamed Mt Bo, after the Obama family dog, because

“It’s just one old man with no name. We treat our dogs better than that, so this dog gets that mountain.”

Finally Mount Rushmore has been renamed Mount Obama. The four presidents

“Are all white. At least the mountain can be named for a black president,” said the administration.

Any hope that in doing this, maybe they’ll carve a fifth, black president into the group?

“You would think that a country living with the benefits of ObamaCare would want a sculpture of the man who gave it to them, sitting in Lincoln’s lap,” said a White House spokesperson.

***

By MARQUEL: Barry & Michelle  — The Mountain High

 

5 COMMENTS

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.