Marquel, TPVs NYTimes Pickled Herring Section correspondent, was eating a pizza when he read Something Not Rotten in Denmark.
An example of a welfare state that taxes heavily but enjoys high employment and general prosperity. Marquel found this interesting but basically unconvincing. Surely if you live at the north pole like the Danes, you might need a little incentive to stay there.
“What’s this about free medical care?” Asked Marquel.
“Everybody gets it.” Said a Dane.
“But it’s not really free. Someone pays. Or are the doctors so bad they work for free? Bad doctors?” Asked Marquel.
“Not at all,” said the Dane. “We have our share of prizes and awards for discoveries, inventions, new techniques. All the doctors get paid.” He said.
“Ah hah! No free medical care after all!” Said Marquel.
“We all pay through progressive taxes. The rich pay the most. The poor pay nothing. But when you walk into a clinic everybody is the same and there is no charge.” He said.
“Sounds like economic hocus pocus. You need ObamaCare.” Marquel said.
“No, the reason we can do this is that every pfenning goes to medical care. We don’t spend fifty per cent or more on our health dollars paying for insurance middlemen, advertising, promotions, company approvals. All our medical service does is provide medical care.” He said.
“Sounds like communism to me.” I said.
“Might be. Others call it socialism. The real question is this: does your body care what you call it? Does your wallet?” He asked me.
“My wallet doesn’t care. I’ll bet with all that free stuff you give away, nobody works.” I objected.
“Actually we have jobs for almost everyone. Middle aged people don’t give up and go home. We have more of them working than you Americans. We’re just about as productive as you and the standard of living is as good or better than yours.” He lied.
“What nonsense. You say ‘just about’ as productive. That means you’re not.” I said confidently.
“No that’s not it at all. When we’re working we equal or surpass you. But when we’re on vacation we’re not.” He said.
“Exactly. So you have worse lives.” I noted.
“Six weeks vacation isn’t a bad life.” He insisted.
“Sure but who could ever afford it?” I asked.
“We can. Everybody gets six weeks. Paid. So everybody affords it.” He said.
“So nobody feels special. Nobody can brag about their vacation to the South of France.” I said.
“That’s true. We all vacation so it’s hard to brag.” He said.
“That’s not much of a vacation with no bragging.” I said.
“We make do,” he admitted. “But we also have free universities.” He said.
“Yeah well that sounds fine. But just try it. University is expensive even when free.” I said.
“Not in Denmark. We actually pay them to go to school, to become educated and better workers. It helps all of us. That’s why we can afford all the other ‘free stuff,’ as you call it.”
“I’d like to see how much they owe in student loans. I think you’re playing a shill game with your students.” I said.
“I can’t believe you. You should come visit” he said.
“I don’t think I’d like it. What would I eat? “I asked.
“Herring” He said.
“For breakfast?” I asked.
“Sure, that works,” he said.
“What about lunch?” I asked.
“Herring” he said.
“Supper?” I asked
“Herring.”
“Any dessert?” I asked.
“Herring.” He said.
I had discovered the fatal flaw in the Sanders let’s-be-like Denmark ploy. Herring all day. What about McDonald’s? Hardees? Taco Bell? Burger King (Not called King for nothing)? Chick Fil A? Ho ho. Good luck with all that, #Bernie.
Dear, dear. Everybody is flawed, isn’t it?
I found Krugman’s piece more interesting than yours.
I I do too with silence.
Loved how you brought Bernie in
I don’t know if a life of herring is worth anything